Understanding the Perceptions of Others

Have you ever caught yourself trying to change someone else’s opinion? Tell them they’d be “…better off if only…”? How many times have you disagreed with someone’s outlook or situation to the point of not even “hearing” them anymore?

Every person has his/her own perception of reality. Understanding these perceptions is instrumental in order to avoid being judgemental. In relationships, whether it be husband and wife, brother and sister, a friend, a co-worker, any type of relationship, tension is created when we don’t understand the perception of the other person.

Perception is the key component to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers). It enables us to avoid most confrontation. After all, if we are judging other people then aren’t we essentially judging ourselves without even thinking about it? This does not mean that we have to agree to everyone’s opinions. But rather we can avoid getting overly-emotional to the point of becoming judgemental. In other words, when we understand that a person is a clark, a scott or a roger (or type a, b and c as the “professionals” would have you say) we understand their perception of reality. This is the most reliable and useful tool when it comes to understanding other people and where they are coming from.

You hear me refer to these 3 types in just about all of my posts. There is a reason for that. If you want to be able to go through life in a manner that it is almost conflict-free in any situation then it is imperative that you understand these 3 perceptions. I can guarantee you that the Wakefield Doctrine will give you the answer to your questions regarding other’s behavior (“Why is he/she acting like that and saying those things?” or “Why does she always have to be the center of attention?”). You will find yourself more willing to listen and actually “hear” what the other person is saying because you will know how they think. Once you understand the world that the other person is experiencing, you are then in a position to communicate effectively. Put another way, imagine that you were fluent in all languages. You then try to communicate with someone over a closed circuit TV, with the sound off. (You also have the ability to read lips). Until you know the language the other person is using to communicate, you will not be able to understand them or be understood….no matter what, no matter how hard you try or how smart you may be. And the added stress when it comes to relationships? Finally the relief from the frustration that you’ve been experiencing is here.

So go to the Doctrine and read up on the three types. It will be quite revealing. You will then know why a person acts the way they do and says the things they say. The lines to effective communication will be opened. And the tension (which leads to chaos) that you have been experiencing will no longer take hold of you.

Related Articles:

Beyond the Comfort Zone  (clairpeek.wordpress.com)

This entry was posted in Personality Types, Psychology, Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Understanding the Perceptions of Others

  1. Pingback: New personality type: the Jonas… | Clairepeek's Creative Writing

  2. Pingback: Depressing… Reality check | Clairepeek's Creative Writing

  3. Pingback: Perceptive World | Clairepeek's Creative Writing

  4. Pingback: Beyond the comfort zone | Clairepeek's Creative Writing

  5. Pingback: Beyond the comfort zone « Clairepeek Wordy World

  6. Pingback: Depressing… Reality check « Clairepeek Wordy World

  7. Pingback: Perceptive World « Clairepeek Wordy World

  8. Clairepeek says:

    Brilliant analogy the doctrine as a language… if it is one (analogy)… no, no, I think that you simply got to the point as Girlie said. I like that as another angle on the doctrine. It is not only a perception but language; as long as you don’t get it / learn its simple basics you won’t be able to understand. ^_^

    • Exactly. And that is the reason for this post. To remind readers who may be having a difficult time appreciating and “getting” the Doctrine (and its usefulness in everyday life) the basics of what it boils down to.

  9. How valuable would it be if the powers that be in Washington were aware of and utilized the Wakefield Docrtine? Seriously. It would go a long way to resolve conflict at home and abroad.


  10. Pingback: New personality type: the Jonas… « Clairepeek Wordy World

  11. What a simple yet to the point post! Most excellent! I agree with you that if you can understand how a person is looking at things, what their “reality” is it relieves a whole lot of pressure. Actually, if everyone could do this – well everyone can do this, it’s a matter of choosing to – then wouldn’t we all be living more “peaceful” lives?! Think of the relief?! Think of how nice it would be to not take things personally simply by knowing it’s not you, it’s them. It’s how the other guy looks at life, how he/she percieves the world. And then knowing how it fits in with your own way of looking at things.
    If I may try on a little scottian here……how fucking simple!! Life just got easier knowing about the Wakefield Doctrine, the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers.

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